Saturday, June 30, 2007

Mama Zeiner goes back to work

Thursday June 28 was Mama Zeiner's first day back to work in almost 5 months. This was a day that honestly I was dreading, not because of work per se but because of leaving the little love of my life for the first time. Before this day, the most I had been away from Zane was about 5 hours. I feel so fortunate that I did get so much quality time with him at the beginning of his life, and like all working moms I had contemplated staying home for good. But it was time to be a grown-up and Thursday was the day. I picked Thursday because I knew I was not ready for a full week away from Zane and with the July 4th holiday afterwards, it gave me some transition time back to work. Amgen gives a summer break at July 4th with a full week of vacation. Luckily my boss is amazing and agreed that this is fine and I was able to catch up on all sorts of misc stuff (like over 2000 emails) before I head back into lab on July 9th.

So how was my first day? It was not only fine, but great. I came back to not just work, but also to a family. I realized how much I had missed my co-workers, friends and the lab. I am a "lab rat" through and through and I look forward to getting back to the bench. I have been with Amgen for 4 years and I feel very comfortable there. I am glad to return.

Zane is doing fine too. Thursday and Friday Zane stayed home with dad. His daycare will not start until August 1st, so dad will stay home for a few more weeks in July and Nana and Papa will come out at the end to help fill in the gaps. Zane loved spending time with daddy, and Gus learned a few things too. =) His is a wonderful and dedicated father. I am very lucky.

That's the update with my life. Hope everyone has a nice July 4th.
Dianna

Monday, June 4, 2007

Prettiest place I have ever breastfed!

I thought I would risk the chance of offending someone and write about something that truly has been a struggle and a triumph in my life. I love this picture for so many reasons, including the beautiful view and moment spent with Zane, but also because getting me to this point was not actually as easy as just "popping out a boob". Being a woman is so amazing to me and many things I have taken for granted have surfaced over the past year. Outside of the fact that pregnancy is never easy (even if you look adorable showing off your belly) and labor is not always what you expect, being the continual source of nourishment for the most precious thing in your life does not come off as natural as just being a mother.

I am not exactly sure how the human race survived knowing that for so many years babies' only source of food were their moms. Personally I have to eat more now than I did when I was pregnant just to be able to resupply myself on a continual basis. I am sure the mothers of the past did not eat steak every night like I do, nor have a husband that cooks both breakfast and dinner for them to make sure that they eat a well balanced meal. Between books, classes, pumping and visiting a lactation consultant this picture is actually worth about $1000. For whatever reason I was determined to make breastfeeding work... and I am very glad I did.

In the beginning, I spent cumulatively about 8-10 hours a day breastfeeding or building up my supply by pumping. This might seem outlandish but it is true, and being a scientist I was steadfast in making sure my son got all of the immunity factors that I could give him. Now I only spend about 4 hours a day feeding Zane and the moments spent are indeed precious. I could have not done this without Gus. Having 4 months off work also helps, but without Gusti I would have given up months ago. There were tears and emotional breaking points to get me to the above picture and the one person that deserves my gratitude is my husband. Gusti is the most loving man a wife could ask for. If you have heard that behind every strong man there is a strong woman... well then behind any new mother there needs to be a support system. At Zane's age, I get most of the praise, but we have two leaders of "Team Zane" in our household. Gus is an amazing husband, friend and father. I have said it before but I will state it again, I feel truly blessed.

For those mothers out there that have ever breastfed -- my heart deeply praises you! And for any other woman that is reading this that I might have scared them into not wanting to breastfeed -- it is worth ALL the effort. My son is healthier and possibly happier because I had the support system to allow me to not give up.

So I am proud of this picture for many reasons... and yes, the view was beautiful!